Tough Love

I think just about every Christian, and even most non-Christians, would agree that “mercy” is an absolutely necessary ingredient for us all to live together–especially as a community of believers.  Sometimes though, I think we can take mercy too far and actually hurt people.  Let me explain.  The other day, I had a conversation with a man and his wife who recently had some serious problems with one of their older children.  Their child had gotten into some serious debt, and the creditors were beginning to be very unhappy.  The parents came up with the money in an effort to help their child… and I must admit, I might have done the same thing.  Unfortunately, their child immediately repeated the error, but, this time to the tune of an even  larger amount of money.  Now what do the parents do?  Mercy, in this instance, would be the wrong medicine.  “Accountability” and “responsibility” are probably more likely to have a positive effect.

To go one further, I understand that my real father had quite a drinking problem (although I never really knew him).  His disease led to many other problems, like theft, fighting, etc.  My God-fearing grandmother–probably the kindest woman I’ve ever met–continually bailed him out.  Today, years after her death, his life is the biggest disaster since the Titanic.  I believe in my heart that a little more “tough-love” could have led him to assume more responsibility for his actions when he was young and possibly changed the outcome of his life–and mine!  The painful truth is, my grandmother’s persistent use of mercy may have helped my father become ill-prepared for real life–because the truth is, real life can be merciless!

“A man of great wrath will suffer punishment; for if you deliver him, you will have to do it again.”  Proverbs 19:19 (NKJV)

In Christ,

PastorJimKilby @Kilbin8er

Jim@JamesKilby.com

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